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Best joke ever, arrrr

Totally ripped off from a poster at a far-off fitness forum: The best joke ever…as told by a pirate:

Bob Hill and his new buxom beauty, Betty, be vacationin’ in Europe; as it happens, in Transylvania. They’re drivin’ a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It’s late, and rainin’ very hard. Bob can barely see 10 feet in fore o’ t’ car. Suddenly t’ car ssprogs out o’ control!

Bob attempts t’ control t’ car, but t’ no avail! T’ car swerves and smashes into a tree. Moments later, Bob shakes his head t’ clear t’ fog. Dazed, he looks over at t’ passenger seat and sees his new buxom beauty unconscious, with her head bleedin’! Despite t’ rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knows he has t’ carry her t’ t’ nearest phone.

Bob carefully picks his buxom beauty up and begins trudgin’ down t’ road. After a short while, he sees a light. He heads towards t’ light, which be comin’ from an old, large house. He approaches t’ door and knocks. A minute passes. A small, hunched man opens t’ door. Bob immediately blurts, “Ahoy!, me name be Bob Hill, and this be me buxom beauty, Betty. We’ve been in a terrible accident, and me buxom beauty has been seriously hurt. Can I please use your phone?”

“I’m sorry,” replies t’ hunchaft, “but we don’t have a phone. me master be a doctor. Come in and I will get him.”

Bob brin’s his buxom beauty in. An elegant man comes down t’ stairs. “I’m afraid me assistant may have misled you. I be not a medical doctor. I be a scientist. However, it be many miles t’ t’ nearest clinic, and I have had basic medical trainin’. I will see what I can do. Igor, brin’ them down t’ t’ laboratory.”

With that, Igor picks up Betty and carries her downstairs, with Bob followin’ closely. Igor places Betty on a table in t’ lab. Bob collapses from exhaustion and his own injuries; so Igor places Bob on an adjoinin’ table.

After a brief examination, Igor’s master looks worried. “Thin’s be serious, Igor. Prepare a transfusion.” Igor and his master work feverishly, but t’ no avail. Bob and Betty Hill be no more.

T’ Hills’ deaths upsets Igor’s master greatly. Wearily, he climbs t’ steps t’ his conservatory, which houses his pipe organ. For it be here that he has always found solace. He begins t’ play, and a stirrin’, almost hauntin’ melody fills t’ house

Meanwhile, Igor be still in t’ lab tidyin’ up. As t’ music fills t’ lab, his eaye catch movement, and he notices t’ fin’ers on Betty Hill’s hand twitch. Stunned, he watches as Bob’s arm begins t’ rise! He be further amazed as Betty sits straight up! Unable t’ contain himself, he dashes up t’ stairs t’ t’ conservatory. He bursts in and shouts t’ his master:
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“Master, Master!… T’ Hills be alive with t’ sound o’ music!”

Comedy gold, and a touch deceptive. The joke zigs a bit when you expect it to zag.

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