Iraq, land of miracles

Idiot GOP senator James Inhofe of Oklahoma said last week that what’s going on in Iraq is “nothing short of a miracle.” Looks like the miracles are coming so thick and fast today that the press can’t keep up. CNN.com sported competing breaking news headers today reporting that “mortar bombs and killings have killed 46 people across Baghdad” and that “a series of attacks in Baghdad has killed at least 39 people and wounded 115 within half an hour.” Take your pick. Either way, that’s a bushel full of miracles.

More to come.

Addendum: The story so far at CNN.

Technorati Tags: Iraq

Put. That Coffee. Down.

Alec Baldwin is one of those actors that I should probably like more than I do. I’ve seen him in just a smattering of roles: the pre-Harrison Ford Jack Ryan in The Hunt for Red October; the dissolute movie star Bob Barringer in State and Main; an unfortunate turn as the iconic Lamont Cranston in The Shadow; a self-portrayal on The Simpsons. And, of course, his stirring performance as Mr. Conductor in Thomas and the Magic Railroad. I’ve always found Baldwin kind of slight, a little underwhelming. But for me, his entire career is redeemed and vindicated by the eight minutes or so he spends in a role especially written for him in the film version of David Mamet’s testosterone fest, Glengarry Glen Ross. To put it succinctly:

Alec Baldwin’s cameo scene from David Mamet’s Glengarry Glen Ross is a classic distillation of what the ideology of hard selling is all about: high pressure, shame, humiliation, competition, and the link between financial success and self worth.

Baldwin’s character, the crisply-dressed and pitiless Blake, parachutes into a sleepy real estate office to threaten, berate, and otherwise motivate its hapless salesmen. His performance, fired by Mamet’s dialogue, is truly a thing of beauty:

Blake: Put. That Coffee. Down. Coffee’s for closers. (Levene scoffs) Do you think I’m fucking with you? I am not fucking with you. I’m here from downtown. I’m here from Mitch and Murray. And I’m here on a mission of mercy. Your name’s Levene?

Levene (Jack Lemmon): Yeah.

Blake: You call yourself a salesman, you son of a bitch?

Eight minutes of pure venom, delivered with a passionate contempt.

Moss (Ed Harris): I don’t have to listen to this shit.

Blake: You certainly don’t, pal. ‘Cause the good news is — you’re fired. The bad news is you’ve got, all you got, just one week to regain your jobs, starting tonight. Starting with tonights sit. (Pause) Oh, have I got your attention now? Good. ‘Cause we’re adding a little something to this months sales contest. As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac Eldorado. Anyone want to see second prize? Second prize’s a set of steak knives. Third prize is you’re fired. You get the picture? You’re laughing now? You got leads. Mitch and Murray paid good money. Get their names to sell them. You can’t close the leads you’re given, you can’t close shit, you are shit, hit the bricks, pal and beat it, ’cause you are going out.

Levene: The leads are weak.

Blake: “The leads are weak.” Fucking leads are weak? You’re weak. I’ve been in this business fifteen years -

Moss: What’s your name?

Blake: Fuck you, that’s my name. You know why, mister? ‘Cause you drove a Hyundai to get here tonight, I drove a eighty thousand dollar BMW. That’s my name.

Brings a smile to my face every time.

Technorati Tags: Alec Baldwin

Where was he?

The question isn’t “Where were you on September 11?”

The question is “Where was he?”

As for what he was reading that day…you can be sure it wasn’t this.

Technorati Tags: 9/11

Utterly unserious

Abroad: The worst television concept since My Mother the Car.

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has called on U.S. President George W. Bush to participate in a “direct television debate with us,” so Iran can voice its point of view on how to end world predicaments.

“But the condition is that there can be no censorship, especially for the American nation,” he said Tuesday.

And at home: Rumsfeld forgot to mention the freshly-painted schoolhouses.

“But it is apparent that many have still not learned history’s lessons,” [Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld] said, adding that part of the problem is that the American news media have tended to emphasize the negative rather than the positive.

He said, for example, that more media attention was given to U.S. soldiers’ abuse of Iraqi prisoners at Abu Ghraib than to the fact that Sgt. 1st Class Paul Ray Smith received the Medal of Honor.

Defending bad judgment

Kevin Drum gets it wrong regarding the media’s walkback on John Mark Karr:

Look. Any news channel that didn’t cover JMK 24/7 would have seen its audience defect en masse to a channel that did. Any media star that ignored the story would have seen the public stampede to a competitor who was covering it. Blaming the media is a little disingenuous, no?

Ah, no. Look (to employ Drum’s tough-guy realism): to give the media a pass for reducing news judgment to the act of wetting a finger and sticking it in the air is to ignore the same practice when the press corps ignores, en masse, stories of genuine national concern. Just because bad judgment is understandable - de rigeur, even - hardly makes it excusable.

Now if Drum’s intent is to criticize the media for employing a “shocked, shocked!” stance on JMK worthy of Captain Renault, that’s another thing altogether. But far from that, it seems that Drum seeks to defend the press for being blind to any consideration apart from ratings. No?

Technorati Tags: John Mark Karr, Jonbenet Ramsey, Media

Manhood, baby

Meet Ronnie Coleman. Professional bodybuilder, eight-time Mr. Olympia. By necessity, the guy is roughly the size of a Ford F-150. This weekend, I ran across a video of Ronnie bench pressing a pair of 200 pound dumbbells - for reps, mind you, not just a one-time max - and was awestruck. I also bench press with dumbbells, but you can be dead certain that the DBs I use don’t weigh 200 pounds.

I am impressed by Ronnie Coleman: his confidence, his application, his mastery of his sport. There are some who say that Ronnie’s…you know…on the juice. I shouldn’t be surprised - bodybuilding is rife with supplement use and abuse - but that’s not what comes to mind just now when I see Ronnie doing these reps. What comes to mind is this: “Ronnie Coleman is a man, baby.”

Meet Ming Tsai. Big-time celebrity chef, noted restaurateur. Not the size of a pickup truck, even though he works around food all day, every day. Every weekend, I watch him dominate his stage of a kitchen, demonstrating master recipes that blend Eastern and Western sensibilities. Food becomes art and performance in his hands. Ming comes off as both a self-assured chef and a regular guy who genuinely enjoys the gustatory pleasures. Additionally, he’s almost annoyingly good-looking.

I envy Ming Tsai: his confidence, his dedication, his mastery of his art. There is a voice in the back of my head that discounts the whole celebrity chef phenomenon as not only irredeemably silly but a sign of the coming Apocalypse, but I don’t hear that voice when I watch Ming in action. What I hear is this: “Ming Tsai is a man, baby.”

Tune in tomorrow

There may be a reason for that

I’m not entirely sure that Ford’s current ad strategy - depicting the fate of the company and brand as a serial drama - is a convincing one. As a viewer, I’m tempted to just change the channel and see what else is on.

Definitions

What kind of cockamamie universe is this where Pluto is no longer a planet, but Joe Lieberman is still a Democrat? Connecticut Dem Registrar Sharon Ferrucci has much to answer for.

“The Democratic Party is founded upon principles of inclusion and diversity of opinion and the promotion of debate,” Ferrucci said. “I do not intend to summon anyone enrolled in my party to defend the good faith and bona fide nature of their affiliation with the Democratic Party.”

Bona fide. That’s funny.

Good thing Ferrucci doesn’t intend to “summon” Lieberman, as he’s much too busy campaigning with Republicans.

Technorati Tags: Joe Lieberman, CT-Sen

The woman who wasn’t there?

It is said of Dracula that he casts no shadow. The same is apparently true of Jean Schmidt, bizarro Republican House rep from the Buckeye State and purported marathon athlete. Nathan Noy, a would-be write-in candidate for the office held by Schmidt, argues that a photo at Schmidt’s web site showing her finishing the 1993 Columbus marathon (in 3 hours, 19 minutes, and 6 seconds, no less) is a fraud. First: the image itself, in which Schmidt (wearing a “Reelect Schmidt” shirt and smiling winningly into the camera) defies our understanding of light and optics by casting no shadow of her own. Of course, the use of Photoshop to doctor the picture and insert Schmidt where she hadn’t been would explain a great deal…but you be the judge:

In addition to the disturbing absence of Schmidt-induced shade, Noy says that a newspaper account of the top finishers in that race - which you’d think should have included Schmidt based on both the time clock in the photo and the “fifth female 40-44″ plaque also represented on her web site) - did not list Schmidt at all. Noy has filed a complaint with Ohio election officials, who are looking into the matter. It’s against the law in Ohio to publish false statements in support of your election effort.

This matter of Jean Schmidt casting no shadow where she really should may not be a one-off. Looking at yet another race image on the Schmidt biography web page - the center image, taken somewhere in Clermont County - shows the putative race participant again feeling no obligation to cast a shadow (unlike other racers).

It makes you wonder whether it’s the laws of physics or the concept of truth in political advertising that Schmidt disdains.

Addendum: Political Wire catches up to the story.

Technorati Tags: Jean Schmidt, OH-2

Hurricane Ray strikes New York

It came to me a while back that continually embattled New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin has “Howard Dean Syndrome.” Cogent observations may lie at the heart of what he says, but it’s difficult to tell because cognitive temperature never rises to a sufficient level to complete the reasoning process. That is: Nagin makes half-baked statements, and usually as loudly as he can. The latest exemplar of this syndrome will be displayed for the public on 60 Minutes this coming Sunday:

New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin criticized efforts to redevelop the World Trade Center site when confronted in a television interview about delays in rebuilding his city after Hurricane Katrina.

During the CBS “60 minutes” interview, a correspondent pointed out flood-damaged cars still on the streets of New Orleans’ devastated Ninth Ward. Nagin replied, “You guys in New York can’t get a hole in the ground fixed, and it’s five years later. So let’s be fair,” according to CBS.

The program is scheduled to air Sunday night. Text and a video clip from the Nagin piece were posted on CBS’ Web site Thursday.

Yeah, there’s a point behind that patented “blunt style” - rebuilding takes time - but it gets lost beneath Nagin’s defensive, dismissive bluster. What could have been a call for understanding of the difficulties involved - and a call for increased help, which NOLA badly needs - becomes instead a combative sound byte better suited for a hometown rally than a national address. There’s a gulf between campaigning and governing, a divide that has escaped politicians other than Nagin. It’s just disappointing to see that after all this time and a hotly contested reelection, he hasn’t actually grasped the difference.

Technorati Tags: Ray Nagin, New Orleans, Hurricane Katrina

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